Like a revelation, the wind struck me at top speed on my way to the bus stop 30 minutes ago. Destroying my sculpture like hair it whistled past my ears howling the words like gods own all powerful voice. It was saying ‘LEARN TO FUCKING DRIVE ASS WIPE!’
Tomorrow morning I shall haul my lazy arse out of bed early, get down to the post office and apply for my provisional driving licence. Things are going to change, before I go raving, jabbering insane.
Mahalo.
I think I might visit Malta this year. The thoughts of sitting on a beach in Gozo, with a drink in my hand and a good book, fill me with a certain sense of joy. Getting up and having breakfast on the balcony, early to bed and early to rise. A proper holiday is exactly what I need.
My last little get away which was last month, can hardly be described as a holiday. Packed into a small car, road tripping it along the northern coast of France. I came back from that trip so jangled that it took me a week to recover. Early to bed, blind drunk, and then early to rise with a serious hangover. Into the little car, and then 9 hours of solid driving. My central memory of that trip are standing on a cliff face, just north of the town of St Mere Eglise, holding a Sony Handycam, with the ice cold wind ferociously battering me as I tried to film.
No that is not what I have in mind this time. This time I shall have a real holiday, filled with sun, sea and serenity. Good air, good food, good drink, good people and good times.
It’s Saturday and as I write this I’m sitting in a room filled with mess and clutter, and the wind is howling at my window outside. The television is on, it’s muted,and I am watching cycling. it is rubbish. England are cycling around with a flag. I am bored and have nothing to do. I hate days like this. Just sitting in my room, blurry eyed, wishing I could take back the last year of my life and start it all over again. I woke up late and my eyes are still half closed. I could still be in bed dreaming for all my fucking mind knows. I’ll feel this way all day. Lethargic, pissed off and fed up with the whole fucking thing. What am I fed up with? Fucked if I know, people, but i am well and truly, royally fucking pissed fucking off with it.
Oh happy days! A revelation has struck me, and now ‘m filled with a sense of elation. For far too long now I’ve hesitated in writing this blog. Too long have I began an entry only to stop half way through because I think that what I’m writing is shit, that nobody will read it, and that those who do read it will laugh and point at me. Well fuck that! Who reads this? Either nobody, or people I don’t know, and thus could give a vaguless fuck what they think about my incessant, spelling error filled, bad grammar strune piece of writing. So from this day forth I shall write what I want. And if you don’t like it lord, then don’t bloody read it.
So why the sudden change of heart, foul mood and bad language? well I’ve been off work the past week due to an ear infection, which has caused a dreadful ammount of pain,coupled with the inability to sleep. This means I’m tired and pissed off. Seriously though, I haven’t been able to leave the house all week. Have you seen Secret Window? I feel like I have some serious cabin fever going on. The only thing that has kept me from going stark raving mad recently is plenty of sweet tea and long hours playing Dragon quest VIII.
I have the game cued at the title screen now, so as I always do, I’ll cut this piece of shit short.
Mahalo
This guy really deserves our support. I’ve been a huge fan of his work for a long time. First discovering him at a popular video game website who’s name I wont utter here. Recently, said website fired his ass for no good reason at all, so what is he doing about this? He’s starting his own website. And it’s all looking very exciting. So head on over to Giant Bomb (.com)
Last night was the first time in 2 nights that I have slept in a bed, and it was a welcome luxury.
I was only in work for 2 hours on Tuesday, so I finished at 16:00 and headed straight to the pub. I didn’t really have anywhere else to go, so I walked into the village near my office, ordered a pint of Spitfire, and read the paper. When I left the pub, I decided to take a walk. There’s a huge park behind the offices where I work, with lakes and woods, it’s really nice. I headed in that direction, but it started to rain so I stopped at the bus stop and lie a cigarette.
When I was on the bus, and half way home, my phone rang. It was my friend Chris asking what I was up to and if I would like to head over to his place for a night of xbox 360 and beer. Of course, I graciously accepted. The game we would play all night and into the early hours was Call of duty 4. An xbox live pleasure, and the game was almost as fun as watching Chris shout down his foul mouthed US opponents. There is no come back to ‘How about I give you some peanut butter. You smear it all over my ass, and if you’re a good boy I’ll let you lick it off”. So, two days later I’m rested and refreshed and ready for a weekend at the office.
What a shit week this has been. Oh well, I’m not going to bother writing anything about it.
I’ve decided to start learning html. I can’t believe I don’t already know it, or at least enough to get by. I’m finding it hard. It’s not the html that’s hard, that stuff’s pretty easy. What I’m finding difficult is the actual process of learning. It’s been such a long time since I actually had to do any kind of real studying, that I’m unsure how to read something and make it stick in my brain.
Fuck it. . .I’m going for a cigarette.
I’ve got to leave for the office in about 20 minutes. I Really can’t be arsed with it all today. Recently my happy reserves have depleted and I just can’t bring my self out of this low I’ve gotten myself in. I’ve started doing stupid things, letting shit get on top of me, and, once again, I’ve began caring too much about what people think of me. A friend of mine recently told me what cheers her up is writing lists of what she needs to accomplish in the next few months in order to become/remain happy.
Three things? That’s rather modest I think. . .I don’t feel better though.
P.S I’ve started smoking. A way to commit suicide slowly.
I refuse to let this blog die. I’m going to continue posting, even if those posts are complete grade A shit. I really don’t care.
Actually, I have quite a bit to write about. The last three weeks have certainly been eventful. when I get time, I’ll throw some of these weird events together into some sort of story, and post it on here. As for today? Well, despite it being a Sunday, and a day of rest, I have to be in the office in an hour. It should be a piece of piss. Turn my computer on, answer some emails, take some calls, drink some coffee, turn my computer off and go home. Job done. I had all of last week off, so to be honest, I really can’t complain.
Anyway, that’s enough from me for today.
I had a dreadful weekend. I went into the office on Saturday at 2 so I could catch up on some work and I didn’t leave until 10, then I did the same thing on Sunday. Thank god it’s Monday. Most people, normal people, will be miserable as shit today, but not me, no sir! I’m glad it’s Monday, after working the weekend, with an empty office, it’ll be good to get back to normality.
I recently acquired a graphics card from a friend of mine, an old ATI Radeon 9800 XT. Uponinstalling the card I soon realised that Half Life 2: Episode Two — which previously was unplayable with my old Nvidia GeForce 6600 — now runs smooth as the proverbial babies bum. So, with a couple of days off last week, due to sickness, I took the liberty of sitting in a hot and stuffy room, in shorts, with sticky-up bed hair and played the bastard from start to finish in one day. What a fantastic experience that was! I’ve always been a big fan of the Half Life games which have always been great fun, and Episode 2 is no exception. I’ll not spoil anything, but I will say that the ending — the first time in a video game — very nearly made me cry. I really didn’t see that one coming.
Along with a graphics card, I’ve also recently acquired a copy of Burnmout Dominator, and since I’ve got a day off tomorrow I think I’ll get stuck into that in a big way.
Happy Monday!
I’ve been off work, for personal reasons, since Tuesday. I’m going back in today and I couldn’t feel more miserable and depressed. Not because I’m returning to work, but because I’ve been off in the first place, and now I know I’ve got a shit load of work to catch up on, plus you get all the ‘are you feeling better now?’ comments. Having a shit load of work to catch up on is an understatement, so I think I’ll be in all weekend now in an effort to catch up just enough to make next week bearable.
I think I’ll throw a couple more cups of strong black coffee down my throat, have a shower and then go. I have a feeling it’s going to be a very long day. Shit, I have the feeling it’s going to be a very long weekend.
Twiter Updates